Sunday, 3 January 2016

2k16 will be tough

Salam alaik

Well its literally cliche, when its come to new year, there will be some speech, new post, some new spirit and new goals or etc.

But have you all realise that everyday is a new day and everyday deserve new spirits and goals.

But now, I don't want to speak out about this. Lets put this as a side dish.

The main dish are ;

What the things that I should change? It is better for me to be still with the old me yet I already used to it? Or just move forward without care those shit-mouth talking back?

Hm well I should begin with my talk. Personally, I hate talking and love to hear out something. I rather write on something than talking to people. But when people ask me for some opinions or some advises, I will talk directly and privately. Actually, I'm not good with people and society. And I'm also bad at making friends.

I'm just a girl with the silent screams inside my heart and head. I scared that I will hurt someone. Because when people talk to me sometimes its hurt and I don't want they feel the same as I am. And I'm just shy with people and society. Even with people that I know, girls, boys and etc. I will talk to them after they talk to me(cruel isn't😭) No, I'm not😭. I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M LIKE THIS, O GOD HELP ME !

So what the things that I should do to get rid of this stuff? This year I want to be the new me but still hold with the old body and personality.


Then.

My goals, I just wanna be happy. My entire life tbh, its sad. Tho, I have my family beside me and of course friends but I don't know man. But I had a feeling, go die you little body, you don't have any use in the earth you don't even have a heart and I'm just faking my smile and go, you have life dude.

I had talk about this with my close friend but we're never meet each other yet hehe.

I told Anis, and she replied

"maybe Allah SWT want to test you taqwa levels. Or maybe your heart were sick, skee"

So what I gonna do?

"you can change a little bit on your ibadah scedule, which means ; if you have qiam on 4 am just make it earlier. Or you can add some sunat prayers"

"You also can practise and always read Surah Insyirah, understand the meaning of the Surah. InshaAllah you will calm"

"You know what, Allah hold every humans heart. He the one who make your heart felt upside-down and He the one who will fix it."

"So, pray to Allah. He the one who deserve to solve your problems, skee"

Thanks, Anis.

So my goal yeah ; nearer to the one I should, Allah SWT.

2k15 were a lot of hardships and playing with my feelings. Its complete 'feel', there were sad, happy, crying, laughing, hurt and etc.

And I hope, I'm just me with the new spirits and goal and be a better person, InshaAllah.

2k16 will be tough dude, I guess so just sado💪

Pray for me yoo, people.